todays text joke

My mate was telling me how he was walking his dog down by the railway last weekend when he spotted this woman tied to the tracks , just like in one of those old movies . He untied her , took her back to his house , cleaned her up , then spend the next two days having the most unbelievable sex . He said they did it in every room , every position , by Sunday night his knob was raw! . Bloody hell I said , what did she look like . That was the funny thing he said , I never did find the head .

After years of pestering, my wife has finally agreed to anal sex!





What's a strapon tho?

What did the slug say to the snail........" big issue"........  

sainsbury car park scam
please be warned over the last month i have become the victim of a clever "eastern european whilst out shopping
simply dropping into sainsburys supermarket for a bit of shopping turned into quite an experience don't be naive to think it can't happen to you and your friends 
heres how the scam works
2 very attractive 20-21 year old girls come over to your car just as you've put your shopping away in the boot and your just about to start the car
they start to wash your windscreen with their breasts almost falling out of the skimpy t-shirts they're wearing
when you thank them and offer them a tip they so no and ask for a lift to another supermarket apayment
you agree and they both get in the back seat on the way there they start getting undressed until both are completely naked
just as you pull over to complain one of them climbs over and starts crawling all over lap kissing you touching you intimately and thryusting herself against you while the other steals your wallet
i had my wallet stolen on august 4th, 9th,10th twice on the 15th,17th,19th,20th,24th,29th 4thsep,5th,9th,10th 
so please be aware
the best times seem to be around lunch time and 4.30 pm
p.s aldi have wallets on special offer at the moment

NSFW anne summer product

http://reviews.annsummers.com/6969-e...p%3Ft%3D128155

http://m.annsummers.com/p/mr-dick-realistic-dildo/07fpsvas1007022


a lesson for us all I think,

Review about 5th or 6th down is my fav, " on his head"

Linky not working.

Whats got 4 legs and can fly ????????????







Two pigeons   

steve wrote:Linky not working.

Try it again, I was trying to be a smart arse and remove the images!

I dont know what to say, I wasent expecting that   

I know, it's like another world out there!

Mrs powells little boy will be along in a minute, this will all seem quite normal to him